Area man browses Weekly World News, 9-11 Commission Report


Allowing his eyes to wander while waiting in the local Pick N Pay, attorney Marc P. Noodlemeyer reacts yesterday after reading parts of the weekly world news and of a slim version of the Kean comission report. 

Although accustomed to the tabloid fare, Marc was none the less compelled to smirk slightly when reading this weeks offerings.  One headline said that a new miracle diet would allow you to lose weight by watching TV and eating Frito-Lays.  Another said that larger forced payments to powerful centralized government agencies would make Americans secure. 

After deciding to stay put and wait rather than change aisles, Marc put down his Coors 30 pack and turned a few more pages to avoid staring at the attractive checkout attendant.

His mind did not really register it as he read 'Newborn baby flies out of mom's womb at 50 m.p.h.!'  Further automatic filters he had built up over the years also kept his mind removed while reading 'Three skyscrapers WTC 1,2, and 7 become the first steel-structure buildings to ever collapse as a result of fire.'    

The two publications are both targeted at similar audiences, and have enjoyed notoriety as best-sellers.